Serendipity
by Jennifer Plager

Jennifer practices at Ryurei Aikido, in Ottawa, Ontario.

Jennifer Plager

Our youngest daughter, Joelle, had become a typical teenager with an "attitude," by early 1994. By happenstance, around the same time, I was introduced to aikido and became enthralled. Having aikido as a physical, mental and emotional stress release was sanity-saving. Like many of us, when I step onto the mats, my only focus is aikido and being totally present.

My husband and I have been blessed with two wonderful girls. Jess, our eldest, sailed through the turbulent teen years on a very even keel. It was a slightly different story with Joelle. We are just too much alike. Strong-willed, focused and stubborn (pig-headed has been mentioned) are some of our common characteristics. We often butted heads as she grew up, but when Joelle hit age 13, the confrontations escalated. We were anything but a happy household.

My study and practice of aikido, though, has been enlightening. Imagine blending and harmonizing with your partner/uke. Even better, you could take these elements off the mat and into your home, work and life. It seemed easier, however, to apply aikido principles at work (a stressful dental office) than at home. Obviously, some effort (slight understatement) was required on my part: stepping out of the way of the little things (i.e. royal blue hair for three months; an extremely messy bedroom; sullenness); stepping in to redirect Joelle's wants to a safer path for us both in the larger issues (e.g. adhering to the agreed curfew). Quite frankly, it was the smaller irritants, especially the sullenness and hostility, that were more of a problem. Possessing a rather volatile temper meant a constant focus on self-control for me (the scars on my tongue attest to my efforts to maintain pleasant dialogue/communication).

It has been a time of learning and growth for us all and continues to be. Aikido has added a balance to my life and that of my family. What a fortuitous gift!


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