Reflections of an aikido spouse
by Beverley Shaw
Aikido has brought a whole new world to our home and to our lives. I mean this in a positive sense, for I cannot think of anything negative that has come into our lives as a result of Joseph participating in aikido. There have been only benefits.
It was after a few years of Joseph's search to find a hobby or interest outside of his addiction counselling and related activities, that he announced one evening he was going to start doing aikido at the YMCA. When I heard that classes were at 7 a.m., I wondered how quickly the novelty would wear off and how soon he would be looking for another interest. I need not have had any doubts, as Joseph took to aikido right from the first class.
Morning after morning, he arose at 5:30 a.m. in order to be at his class in ample time for a proper warm up. Some mornings he could barely walk because of the aches and pains from his aikido classes. His body was being turned, tossed, twisted and rolled as it had never been before in his life. Sometimes even getting out of a chair or getting up from the couch was a bit of struggle. He developed a mode of walking that I nicknamed the aikido shuffle. We have had many laughs together about that shuffle and his aches and pains. The medicine cabinet slowly filled with liniments, Epsom salts, bandages, knee supports and special tape for strapping injured fingers. The freezer also began to take on a different appearance. Gone was the package of peas for the netball injury I sometimes experienced, and in came freezer packs in different sizes—a small one for the minor injuries and a large pack for the more serious ones. Then the heating pack arrived to complete the picture. We had medical supplies for any kind of injury that might occur, be it from aikido or from netball. We were prepared!
It was after about the first year that the more acute aches and pains began to settle somewhat. Joseph gradually became more adept and flexible in his practice. His enthusiasm never waned. He liked nothing better than to demonstrate the latest move he had learned in class. I have been required to partake in the most recently learned aikido move in a variety of venues. I have found myself on the subway with my arms flung over my head. I have been turned and twisted in the frozen food section of the local supermarket. Joseph has also demonstrated aikido on the sidewalk, the bus, at the movie theatre and dinner parties. Joseph's enthusiasm is contagious. As a result, our friend Nathan started doing aikido. Now there were two aikido shufflers in my life.
Finally, the best benefit of all and the one which I believe helped save Joseph's life is that he has learned to become very centred in a time of crisis. During his heart attack, he did not panic and he did not lose his sense of humour. While we were in the emergency ward, Joseph asked me if I noticed the good-looking fireman who came to the rescue. Joseph thought he looked like an actor right out of the movies and had visions of himself rushing into a burning building to rescue a damsel in distress. I do admit that, for a fleeting moment, I considered throwing myself on the bed in an anxiety attack, screaming for help. Because Joseph remained calm, so did I (scared, but calm). I believe that Joseph's speedy recovery was the result of his strong desire to return to aikido, as well as his being in pretty good physical shape before the attack. The support and good wishes he received from his aikido friends also helped him in his recovery.
There have been many benefits for Joseph in doing aikido, and by a natural process I have experienced these benefits also. Joseph now has an interest/sport that he is involved in outside of his counselling activities. His spiritual and physical health have grown immensely during this time. It has been wonderful to watch and feel his enthusiasm. I have also enjoyed attending the testing sessions and watching some of the seminars. One of the most wonderful benefits for both of us has been meeting a whole new group of people and partaking in the social activities. There is always a very special ambience at aikido functions, and I am grateful that I have been able to join in the social activities with Joseph and meet many wonderful people. And the food is always excellent! Thanks to aikido for bringing a very valuable and positive influence to our lives.
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